Prayer Partner and Prayer Partnership How To
This prayer partner how-to will give you the essential information needed to form and enjoy a successful prayer partnership.
A prayer partnership is made up of two people who agree to meet for prayer on a regular basis.
Forming a prayer partnership moves prayer from personal, private prayer done alone into the arena of interactive/community-based prayer with others.
The key differences between a prayer partnership and a larger prayer group of multiple people are the size, logistics and focus. Since there are only two people in a prayer partnership, praying together is more personal, flexible, and private.
What the Bible says about the power of 2 praying together
When just two people pray together, the Bible tells us that prayer power is multiplied.
Jesus is present when two or more are gathered
In the Bible Jesus says, “Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them.” (Matthew 18:19,20 NIV)
When at least two people pray together, Jesus is the unseen third partner.
Two people were necessary as witnesses in Jewish Law
Two people agreeing on a matter also parallels an ancient legal requirement. According to Jewish law, two witnesses were the legal minimum for settling disputes. Jesus talks about this in John 8 :17 when he says to the Jewish leaders, “In your own Law it is written that the testimony of two men is valid.” (NIV)
Types of prayer partnerships
Prayer partnerships usually start because two people share common needs or interests.
Mutual support
Some partnerships are based on their life situations, such as raising teenagers. These types of prayer partnerships form for mutual support, encouragement and God’s help and guidance for common, specific ongoing life needs.
Interceding for a cause
Other prayer partnerships form to pray about a very specific cause, issue or conflict, such as praying for drug addiction, praying for the unsaved or for a world crisis.
Life crisis partnership
Sometimes prayer partnerships come into being because one of two people is going through a life crisis such as a divorce or serious illness. The other partner acts as an intercessor who brings God’s presence, guidance and comfort to the situation. Though each may pray for the other, the prayer time is heavily weighted toward praying for the needs of the person in crisis.
Life direction or spiritual growth prayer partnership
Sometimes one or both prayer partners are at a life crossroads trying to decide which direction to go. Or they might want to improve their prayer life or grow spiritually together.
Assigned prayer partnership
On other occasions, short term prayer partnerships might be assigned by a church or religious organization, such as an adult being assigned to pray for a specific college student.
A doing-life-together prayer partnership
Often prayer partnerships more closely mirror a friendship. These partnerships include elements of accountability, confession, intercession and celebrating life’s joys together.
The bottom line is that each prayer partnership is based on the current needs and desires of the two prayer partners.
How to start a prayer partnership
Here are some of the steps in finding a prayer partner and establishing a prayer partnership
Identify a potential prayer partner
The first step in finding a prayer partner is to ask for God’s guidance.
The two qualifications you should look for in a prayer partner are shared faith and connection.
Shared faith means that they are a Christian who prays, studies the Bible and tries to apply God’s principles to their lives.
Connection means they are someone in your circle of relationship who might share your reason for wanting to be in a prayer partnership.
When seeking a prayer partner, look for someone of your same gender. (The only exceptions are those in your close family circle such as mother/son, husband/wife etc.) Same gender prayer partnerships are necessary because it’s wise to avoid spending time alone with members of the opposite sex, especially one on one. This helps avoid gossip, suspicions or further complications.
Consider your friends, relatives and closest connections first. Then branch out to those you know more casually at church or in Bible study groups.
Don’t overlook people you might know through community support groups or work.
You might even re-connect with someone you don’t see regularly now but you knew well in the past.
And don’t forget to consider someone in a different generation who can bring the wisdom of experience to a prayer partnership.
Be open to the possibility of forming a prayer partnership with someone going through a life crisis who needs prayer support. Be alert when you sense someone might be secretly struggling and offer to pray with them.
Finally, you can ask your pastor or a leader of your church if they might have someone they could recommend to you as a prayer partner.
Ask them if they’re interested in a prayer partnership
Start by praying about when and how to contact your prospective prayer partner.
You might begin the conversation by telling them you’ve recently become interested in finding someone to be your prayer partner. Then tell them why you feel this need.
If they’re not sure what a prayer partnership is, you can refer them to this article.
During the initial conversation it’s good to reassure them that in prayer partnerships, all prayers and requests are considered confidential. Also mention that the two of you can do the prayer times any time, place or way you want.
Agree on when, where and how to meet
Because prayer partnerships only involve 2 people, setting up the logistics of your prayer time should easily fall into place. Here are some ideas and suggestions.
How to meet
We’re discussing how to meet first because that could be a determining factor in where and when you meet.
The majority of prayer partners meet together in person. However, prayer partners can pray together over the phone or through other means.
As an example, I have a phone prayer partner. She’s someone I knew in another city years ago. In fact, even though we pray together weekly, it’s probably been 10 years since we last saw each other! One of the advantages of a phone-based prayer partnership is that the choice of times is greatly expanded including early morning and later at night.
Some prayer partners might connect through text, email or other written means. I think this could work in some cases, but I personally feel that the power of a prayer partnership is in the real-time interplay of audible, prayerful conversation.
Where to meet
Most prayer partners meet in one of their own homes. When meeting in a home, make sure the time and place are as private and distraction free as possible.
As an example, when I met with a prayer partner whose husband worked from home we met in her basement.
Another time when my prayer partner and I both had babies, we often met in one of our baby’s rooms on the floor with lots of toys surrounding us. We prayed with our eyes opened so we could keep an eye on things. Were we distracted and interrupted? Yes, but we made it work.
Although you may be tempted to meet in a restaurant, coffee shop or in a park, be aware that public places don’t work well for prayer. You’ll end up talking about problems and not praying for them. Or you’ll feel self-conscious about praying. Or you’ll hurry your prayers.
My recommendation is if you must meet in a public place, find somewhere private to pray afterwards even if it’s sitting together in your parked car.
Private places offer other advantages as well. You can share personal things without worrying that someone might overhear you. And praying together sometimes brings emotions with it. If you’re like me, you’d rather not cry in public.
When to meet
After you’ve determined how to meet and where to meet, deciding when usually works itself out.
Look for small windows of time. Sometimes finding these windows require creativity. As an example, if both of you take your children to children’s choir practice weekly, you could find an unused classroom in the building where you can pray together. Just be sure you have the OK from the facility manager to do so. Or if you both work in the same office, find a time before or after working hours.
Make sure you also decide how long you’ll meet to keep everyone on schedule.
What to do during the prayer partner meeting time
Over time you and your prayer partner will find a good balance of what you do during your prayer time. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
Start with a brief check-in
It’s good to begin by catching up on what has happened in your life since your last meeting. During this time, it’s helpful to bring up anything new that has come up. Share any spiritual struggles. Mention anything you didn’t get right so you can pray that you’ll deal with it better in the future.
Beware. There’s a point where this “catch up time” can derail your purpose. As a rule of thumb, always make sure you spend equal or more time praying than you do talking about your needs.
Pray in a way that suits your partnership
Customarily, prayer partners pray together in a conversational style, praying the words that come to mind as they go along. This style is informal, personal and expressed in everyday language.
To enhance the scope of prayers, prayer partners should know the Bible so verses can come to mind as they pray. In other cases, they might research and list verses that apply to their partner’s situation and bring them with them so they can be used in prayer time.
Be real during your prayers. Don’t be afraid to ask God questions or admit you don’t understand things. Express your emotions about unfair situations. Lament tragedies. Commend your partner to God for their good qualities. Thank Him for what you see him doing in your lives. Listen for God’s direction and guidance. Let silence lapse when appropriate.
Remember that the purpose of your prayer partnership isn’t to fix things. It’s to bring them to God and to be open to hearing what He has to say or to see what He is doing.
Take time to thank God for progress
One of my prayer partners had the ability to see and thank God for something small every time we prayed. This was surprising since she was going through a terrible life crisis caused by someone else’s destructive actions. Every time we met to pray, she thanked God for a bit of progress, a small revelation of the truth or in her growing ability to say the right words or to react in the right way.
Prayer partners can affirm what they see God doing, thank Him for it and encourage each other that He is at work.
Pray first, give advice later
When you’re meeting one-on-one it’s easy to give into the impulse to start with advice instead of prayer. Always pray first! Here are the reasons.
Prayer seeks God’s direction, not human fixes.
Advice needs to be filtered through prayer because we react based on past experiences and personal biases.
We also give advice based on our emotional responses. Negative emotions that skew advice include fear, anger, grief and a sense of injustice. Even positive emotions like pity, love and compassion can lead us astray by causing us to become overprotective or use platitudes that give false hope.
Be flexible and follow the greatest prayer need
At times one of the partners may experience a crisis that needs concentrated prayer attention. The beauty of a prayer partnership of 2 is that when the situation arises, you are able to devote most or all of a meeting to a single pressing prayer need of one of the partners.
Pray TOGETHER!
Prayer partners are designed to pray out loud with each other, not just talk about problems and then promise to pray about them alone at home later.
If I’m in a situation where we’re supposed to “pray later” I often forget to do so. And if I do pray, the immediacy is gone and my prayer is generalized and lacks emotional depth. On the rare occasions back home when I do have a deeply meaningful time of prayer for my partner, they didn’t get to hear exactly what I prayed. They miss little signs and nudges from God where the Holy Spirit directed me to unknowingly pray a small detail that God knows they need to hear.
The other thing we lose by not praying when we’re together is the transcendent power of presence. Jesus walked among us in bodily form. Paul says the Holy Spirit lives inside of us and therefore our bodies are the Temple of God. Our physical presence carries our spiritual presence. The touch of someone’s hand on our shoulder. A hug. Holding hands. When used in prayer, they are divine conduits and connection points.
Length of prayer partnerships
How long a prayer partnerships lasts is best answered by the two prayer partners and the specific focus of their prayer times.
As an example, if you’re praying together over a short-term problem such as unemployment, the reason for the prayer partnership is resolved when a job is found.
On the other hand, if you’re establishing a doing-lie-together prayer partnership, the length might be long term. When starting a general life prayer partnership, it’s recommended that you agree on an initial time frame such as 3 months. That gives you time to see how well things are working for both partners as far as logistics and the usefulness of the prayer times. At the end of three months, you can then commit to a longer time.
Ending a prayer partnership usually happens organically. The short-term issue is resolved. The schedules of the partners changes. Someone moves. Children grow up. Your personal needs change.
Prayer partnerships can also evolve from one type to another. As an example, a woman I knew when I lived in another neighborhood emailed me during the Covid 19 pandemic quarantine. We began a phone prayer partnership to pray for an end to the pandemic. We had hoped this would be a short-term prayer issue. As you know, it wasn’t.
After around two years when the pandemic crisis finally ended, we agreed to continue our phone prayer partnership. There was still plenty to pray about for our families, churches and world issues. Our prayer partnership changed from an issue oriented partnership to a longer term a doing-like-together prayer partnership that continues today.
A Bible example of a prayer partnership
In Acts 16 there’s an account of Paul and Silas in chains in jail in Phillipi after being attacked and beaten by an angry mob for “throwing the city in an uproar” by exorcising a demon from a slave girl.
Instead of being despondent, Paul and Silas turned their jail time into a prayer partnership. The Bible says the two prayed together and sang hymns with enough volume that all of the prisoners in the jail not only heard, but they also listened.
At midnight there was a huge earthquake, the jail doors flew opened and the chains on all of the prisoners fell loose.
When the jailer saw the doors wide open, he assumed the prisoners had escaped and he knew the authorities would execute him as a consequence. As the jailer drew his sword to kill himself, Paul called out to him that none of the prisoners had fled!
The jailer was so astonished that he took Paul and Silas into his home where he dressed their wounds. There the two took the opportunity to preach to his family. As a result, the jailer and his whole household were saved.
An historical example of the power of a prayer partnership
The year was 1949 and the place was the island of Lewis in the Hebrides islands off the coast of Scotland. World War II and economic downturn had negatively affected the mood of the general population and vast numbers had grown cold in their faith.
Against this backdrop, two sisters in their eighties, Peggy (who was blind) and Christine (who had arthritis) decided to partner in prayer for revival. Months passed as they fervently prayed together at a set time for hours on end. On a winter morning when hope seemed elusive, Peggy received a word from God. “I will pour water upon him who is thirsty, and floods upon the dry ground”
Meetings began with a man named Duncan Campbell preaching at services. Following one of the services, a group of men stayed afterwards to pray far into the night. When they left the prayer meeting at 3 AM they were astonished to find both men and women strangely out on the roads many with their faces to the ground confessing their sins and seeking God.
A revival swept over the island and transformed thousands of lives. Today it is known in history as the Hebrides Revival and Awakening. And there in the history books is also the powerful prayer partnership of Peggy and Christine Smith.
My Personal Experiences with Prayer Partners
Over the years I have been in a number of different prayer partnerships, some formal, others less formal. Yet all were very powerful, useful and inspiring.
The perfect prayer partner for my time of need
Some prayer partnerships were lifelines to me, like the prayer partner who also was the mother of a grown son with mental health struggles. At the time, my son’s mental health problems were new to us and very scary. My prayer partner’s son was many years farther along on his mental health journey. It was helpful to see how things could stabilize and be OK even when the challenges of the illness were still being worked out. We understood things in a way outsiders couldn’t. This made our prayer times together real, compassionate and helpful.
Although we were praying for our sons, we also were praying for each other for own spiritual, emotional and mental needs and we in turn received the shining light of God’s truth, hope and promises.
The prayer partner who boosted my spiritual temperature
Another time I was a prayer partner with a different mom who co-led a neighborhood Bible study with me. We lived just around the block from each other so we prayed together in her home when my boys were off to school and her toddler was upstairs napping. Our typical prayers were for our neighborhood group, our children and for spiritual growth for family members.
One day before our meeting a young man knocked on my door selling miracle cleaner. I didn’t buy anything. On my walk over to my prayer partner’s house, I saw the young man knocking on another neighbor’s door. I told my prayer partner about him, more as a warning that we might get interrupted. She said we should pray for him. So we did.
Sure enough, he knocked on her door during our prayer time. She invited him in and introduced me as her prayer partner. He proceeded with his pitch about the cleaner. Then my prayer partner gave her own pitch to the young man about how God had a plan for his life.
The young man’s mouth fell open and he said he had a praying mother and lately he’d been thinking he needed to get right with God. Long story short, we ended up praying for God’s help and will in the young man’s life and my prayer partner ended up buying a bottle of the miracle cleaner.
Our prayer partnership ended when I moved away to another town. Around 3 years later I was reading through my old journals and paused over the story of the young man and the miracle cleaner. I suddenly wondered why nothing like that ever happened in my prayer times any more. I realized that now, 3 years later, my feelings of God’s presence and power during my prayer times had cooled off dramatically.
Why the difference? It was because I wasn’t praying with anyone any more. I was only praying on my own. And when you’re only praying on your own, prayer time can get crowded out by anything and everything.
Not only does a prayer partnership bring consistency and rhythm to your prayer life, it also adds accountability and raises your spiritual prayer temperature by challenging you to grow. And it can give you enough courage to pray with purposeful expectancy for strangers who knock on your door.
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Copyright Karen Barber 2026. All rights reserved.
