This Broken Friendship Prayer helps you receive God’s help when friends say things that hurt you.
According to relationship experts, hurtful words are a major reason that friendships are broken. Such words hurt us more deeply because they come from someone we thought we could trust. We also felt that this person liked us and accepted us for who we are. We expect friends to be there for us during the tough times as well as the good times. We expect them to be concerned for our welfare and to have our back.
That’s why it’s such a deep and lasting shock when a friend says something that hurts us deeply.
Broken Friendship Prayer by Mary Justice
Father God, most precious Heavenly Father, I have a burden on my heart. A burden that comes from a broken friendship that simply weighs heavy on my heart.
Father God, you know what is on my heart concerning this burden. I have given it up to you many times, but it continues to be something that I am dealing with.
I know that sometimes it is best that relationships are broken. Sometimes that is part of the bigger plan that you have for me.
I know that people come into my life for many different reasons. Some people stay a life time. Some people come and go.
Some people simply may say something that just breaks my heart and words once spoken, cannot be taken back. They hurt, they gnaw at me, they are constantly reminders of a friendship gone wrong. I feel betrayed and bitter and stunned. I try to forget, but something just reminds me of those words from time to time and I feel the pain and hurt all over again.
But Father God, you are such an awesome God. You know when I am hurting.
You have a way of sending a song, or a funny sight or a funny memory comes to mind and I soon find myself laughing and all of a sudden the hurt goes away. At least for a moment.
When I can find laughter, my mood is definitely lightened. This is a simple reminder that you can do anything, including healing a broken relationship. All I can do is simply pray for this person.
Continue to ask you, my heavenly Father to watch over this person and if it is your will, heavenly Father, reconciliation will occur. If not, I know there is still so much more for me to enjoy and many more friends to share this journey along life’s highway.
Father God, how true it is that in the depths of my despair, you always send something my way that brings me joy. All is truly possible through you.
In your sweet name, I pray, Amen.
Copyright Mary Justice 2018. All rights reserved.
Further help from God as you pray for guidance about broken friendships
By Karen Barber, editor, Prayer Ideas
In this Broken Friendship Prayer Mary Justice helps us get in touch with God’s help in letting go of the hurt and sadness when a friendship is broken by hurtful words. Mary’s prayer focuses on getting over the hurt once the friendship has been broken off completely.
If you’ve recently been hurt by something a friend has said, it’s helpful to pray for God’s guidance about how to approach your friend in hopes of reconciling.
Here is a list of things to pray about and ask for God’s help and guidance if you are planning to try and talk to your friend about your feelings.
Ask God to help you cool down your emotions first to a reasonable level before attempting to talk to your friend about their hurtful words. Ask God to show you what you need to do, whether it be removing yourself from the situation for a day or two, doing a physical activity first or sleeping on it before approaching your friend.
Ask God to help you set a good time and place to talk with your friend.
Ask God to give you wisdom on what to say to your friend. Ask God to help you simply state what was said and how it made you feel and why.
Ask God to help you listen well to your friend’s response. Experts say it’s often a good idea to say things like, “What I think I hear you saying is…” and then repeat back what they have said. Then ask, “Is that right?”
After you talk to your friend, ask God to help you sort out whether the person understood you or if they simply made excuses, covered up things, acted as if it was no big deal or was truly apologetic for having hurt you.
Ask God to help you evaluate other things going on in your friend’s life that may have contributed to their hurtful words. For example, your friend may have been dealing with a personal issue you didn’t know about such as divorce, loss or illness. They also may be in a different life stage than you are and don’t have good empathy for your life. They may have unresolved personality/coping issues. Their values may be much different than yours, such as their moral values and faith. They may have changed or grown in a direction much different than you have. They may have a tendency to place all the blame on others. They may be jealous. The list is very long.
Ask God to show you if it’s healthy to continue in this friendship or if it’s time for you to move on.
What the Bible Says about being betrayed by friends
Jesus describes a person who pretends to be a friend but who secretly has ulterior motives as “wolves in sheep’s clothing.” (See Matthew 7:15) Jesus himself was betrayed by a friend named Judas who led the Temple guard to Jesus so they could arrest him. Judas kissed Jesus on the cheek as a sign to the guards. At the moment of betrayal Jesus called Judas his friend. (see Matthew 26:47- 50)
One of the most detailed examples of friends saying hurtful things is found in the book of Job. Nearly the entire book records arguments and accusations made about Job by his three so-called friends. Job has been through calamities that have left him penniless, grieving the death of his family and physically ill. His friends take it upon themselves to tell Job that God punishes bad people, so therefore Job must be bad or have done something bad. In their discourse they call people who get punished like Job godless, sinful, deceitful, wicked, witless and self-righteous.
When his friends try to lay a guilt trip on Job says in agony, “A despairing man should have the devotion of his friends.” (Job 6:14 NIV)
In the end, God steps in to settle the argument. Job realizes that God is so much greater than his understanding. God commends Job when he apologizes for ever questioning God’s goodness. However God is angry at Job‘s friends because “you have not spoken of me what is right.” (Job 42:7 NIV) God asks Job to pray for his friends so God will accept their sacrifices that show they have repented.
What the Bible says about true friendship
Thankfully, Jesus is our perfect role model as a friend. Jesus shows by his own willingness to sacrifice himself for us as the true mark of friendship. Jesus says, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command.” (John 15:12-14 NIV)
Proverbs says, “A friend loves at all times.” (Proverbs 17:17 NIV) It also says, “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24 NIV)
Here are other Bible verses that have bearing on friendships.
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” (Luke 6:31)
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up . But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up…Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9,10,12 NIV)
“A righteous man is cautious in friendship.” (Proverbs 12:26 NIV)
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Copyright Karen Barber 2018. All rights reserved.